I said I wasn't going to blog about it, but .... I mean .... c'mon! 2days?!! We waited until almost mid-month to get 2 days worth of referrals? I'm not sure what to think.
Either the CCAA has DRAMATICALLY cut down on the number of referrals they normally issue each month, or those 2 days were humongous! And I mean big. There's talk around the internet that the next couple of batches could be for equally small numbers of days. I believe that could be true. Although my agency doesn't share any information on how many dossiers the send, they do say how many referrals they received. And they haven't had any in the past two batches. I believe my agency handles more chinese adoptions than any other and they didn't get ANY in the past two months (except expedited) I think we are in for a doozy of a batch next time. All of those people who should have been spread out over the month of October were clumped together at the end.
I know no one outside the community understands all that, so let me break it down for you. Remember how I thought I'd get a referral in September at the latest? Well, October is looking more likely. November is a strong contender, and rotten stinking December is an actual possiblity. To summarize: I have no idea when I will see Zoe for the first time. If it's really that bad, she may still not even be born yet. I don't see how it could possibly be any later than December, but I've said that too many times to count.
Also, there's other weirdness in the Chinese adoption world. Someone on RQ mentioned a family who requested a girl as young as possible, and they were referred a 4.5 year old. Also, in every batch I hear of more and more boys going to familes who requested girls. Overall, it's still extremely rare, but it does make this pink-nursery-decorating-future-Mommy nervous.
I'm sure it's just the shock of the 2 days, but I have less faith in the program lately. For the first time, I question whether it will actually happen, whether we made the right decision. With almost any other choice we would have had a baby by now. We could still switch to some countries, start all over and be done before we see Zoe.
This is by far the hardest thing I have ever done.
How can I possibly kill the next 7-9 months?
10 comments:
This is just so horrible. I am now bracing for a few more batches of two to three days. And I am worried about the "weirdness" of China adoption too. It is hard to name a boy "Briana". :)
All I can say is to try to hang in there. I know it is so hard. Sending you big hugs!
you need a vacation to sunny, beautiful ...Florida!!!
I vote for Florida, too!
This sure does suck. I wish they could just tell us "You will get your referral in ______" If I had a firm date, I could live with it...even it were December (God forbid).
Long e-mail coming your way soon. Work is killing me ;)
Hang in there!
Dawn (fellow 12/20 DTCer)
Come to Florida - we need cheering up too!!
Alyson
This has to be sooooooooooooooo depressing, butI know you and my super son-in-law won't give up on getting Zoe. Hey! Us expectant Nanas may not understand the adoption lingo, but we're waiting too, and I can't think of anything more important to me than seeing you loving on your precious baby.
Love love, Mom
I agree with you - things are weird now and a bit scary. I think you guys are like us and have probably finished all of your home improvement projects ny now. So the next best thing is to travel. Get out of town and away from the computer and the boards. Every weekend if you have to! I think we have had about 6 babymoons by now. For us, we escape so we just don't have time to think about it. I know, we are putting our heads in the sand, but at this point, we have no control over it whatsoever. It still stinks though.
That's just crappy! My prayers and love are with you.
This stinks - wait - no -it sucks. What did Mick say - Mooseballs? Don't even think blue :-)
Hang in there - I know that it bites to hear that again - but the thing is, Zoe will happen.
We are a little over a month behind you, and our projections keep jumping out a month every time I blink! Yep - hard to wait and harder to understand!
Lucy
If it helps(?) I was fearing this. My agency let skip the counts-and-lids spreadsheet once. I looked at October and said, "Oh my".
My agency had 36 referrals last month. This month, for a single day (covering my agency) they had 30.
Sorry.
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